32

Saturday night. Natalie in bed, had an episode of an attack earlier today, not full on like and fair play she battled through it, but it's back and I'm so scared for her. 

She doesn't deserve this.

Finished at Cuntuit Global. No fuss. No goodbyes to the horrible fuckers.

Made a couple of decent friends hopefully. 

Onwards. 

Just gonna chill and then look forward to BG. Gonna be a learning curve.

Been watching re runs of Shameless from the top. Fucking great show.

Not much else to report.

Oh, saw an online article about a 56 year old geezer who had lost his leg to gangrene, and after having a stroke lost use of left arm, and had been rejected by RCT for payments  towards a carer..... 

The man, when I knew him was a horrible vicious cunt at times, always on edge around him, never forget that feeling, he rented me a room for a short while, when I really needed one but it has to be said he only did that because at the time it suited him, he fucking hated me and rightly so. Anyway, he was a mates old fella, but it's surreal to see someone who intimidated me so much look so vulnerable. Wouldn't wish that on any fucker. As much of a cunt as they may have been.

Thought of the day:

Be nice to people. 

In a bit. X

31

It's 13th September. 

What a come down. Huge come down. 

Since my last post I've experienced the greatest two weeks of my life. Nothing will quite top it.

This last week I have retuned to work. It's been grim. For both of us.

But those two weeks will never be matched. A beautiful wedding an amazing honeymoon. 

A sense of sadness hangs over me because it's over, but hopefully that will subside as life kicks back in for us.

Words really can't do it justice, the memories are stored and I guess to be reflected upon, so i not gonna go into it here because some things are sacred. 

I love my wife. 

Thought of the day:

Lucky bastard.

In a bit.

30

This is my 30th entry and the last as a single man.
I say single, I'm clearly not single, but that's what you say in it..!?

So, wedding tomorrow. Getting hitched. Married. This is what its like then..... dead excited for it and still not nervous one little bit, that will change soon no doubt, couple of bevvies later and off we go.

Was thinking on train home that this is probably one of the biggest, or should I say, most relevant events that will happen in my life, actually marrying somebody, becoming their husband. Its pretty huge and it's what I , in my one and only shot at life, have been lucky to be involved in, to be loved. Its quite profound to me in that sense. Powerful.

Anyway, Natalie having funny shit going on in the ears again, so fucking scared its coming back and if so what next? Trying not to let her focus too much on it but being tactful and sensitive to her plight is tricky going down that road, its not that I'm not of course but Im not sure pondering on it helps her....

Teeth gonna be polished tomorrow, had a right fiasco with that the other day, a wasted journey, but it's paid for and booked so has to be done. Parking will be a cunt.
Pick chair covers up also, then pick up my old man. Few bevvies bit of a smoke and job done.

Thought of the day:
Do her proud.

In a bit.

29

6 days. Six days. Six. Days.
How quick is this going eh.... I kind of don't want it to come because I'm enjoying this excited feeling. haha.
Nat is asleep, she's been feeling weird ear wise, which isn't good but fingers crossed shell be ok.
Been suffering pain wise so on the trams again.
Not feeling myself really, dunno, something's not right.
Yeh teeth whiteners told me to do one, that my teeth are too fucked, so they wanted to do x rays at 10 quid a pop, 4 of them and recommended some other treatment to remove stains, more expensive than original deal, couldn't make a choice then and there, so said I'd leave it. Booked scale and polish with my dentist. 42 bucks. Should be enough.

Gonna go bed. Am fucked.

Thought of the day:
Doing nothing is mentally productive.

In a bit.

Kos Stuff

http://www.holidayvillagekos.com/The-Island-Of-Kos

28

So, 10 days to go then..... so excited, like a boy on Xmas eve... booked honeymoon to Kos, can't remember if I mentioned that already, I'll check.... no it was day before my last 'entry' ..

Yeh so Kos, all in/sea view room/from Bristol 7 nights. 1500. Not bad that... ok it's not cheap we know that but its paid for from gifts of money for wedding, and we have used it well there. Can't wait but nervous about flying. Tramadols most probs.

Laying well off them right now although I say that I've had two today for my legs, been having a few twinges as well, similar sensations when I pee and dull aches in the flanks, all prior symptoms to what kicked all this cancer men 1 nonsense off back when the Olympics was in LAndan. Keep an eye on that.

Natalie having issues with her ear, tinnitus and fullness and one moment of in balance. I'd take Cancer back over her going through that again. In an instant. We'll get through it tho, IF it does return. Touch Wood.

Lauren doing her lessons, onto three point turns next, piece off piss them I said, shell be fine.

Day off tomorrow, its getting closer to the day I'll be leaving, gonna be quite upset tbh, may get emotional, but a new start is a good start and its such a positive move.
Made a couple of genuine mates I'd like to think.
That's all you can ask init.... Good friends are hard to find.

Natalie's gifts are sorted. Can't wait for her to see them.

Having me teeth whitened later today, its 2am BTW, Yeh I do hope it works, we shall see.

Watching Family Guy. Lois Killed Stewie.
Robin Williams is dead. A sad day. A lifetime of laughter.

Thought of the day:
Skin up.

In a bit.

27

16 days to go. That's mad that.
Passport came yesterday, so chuffed. Means we can now book honeymoon, gonna be fun, that whole process.
All dresses acquired from shop, finally, after so many setbacks, they are safe and sound.
Natalie pleased.

Had the worst pain ever this morning, apparently I woke up screaming in pain twice but I remember it as once, anyway, migraine from hell, sharp, stabbing pains in the head, felt sick but fell asleep thankfully, off work again tho, more money down the drain....

So, Chillin now and nat has he make up appt tomorrow at 11am so I will drop her off to train station and then leave here about midday to meet in town... book honeymoon. Yey.

Thought of the day:
Listen to my body.

In a bit. x